So, here I am, after midnight, staring at my computer screen as I have been for the past several hours. It’s late, I’m traveling tomorrow, and all logic says I should be going to bed. But something always thwarts my most valiant attempts to get a decent amount of sleep, whether it’s writing, reading, Facebook, or my most recent addiction, Farkle (I can thank my friend Lauren for that). But, at this particular moment, the spell keeping me awake happens to be that of blogging.

This morning, I went with several of my friends to a music jam in my friend’s basement. The instruments eventually included I think two bass guitars, two regular guitars, a drum set, a keyboard, occasionally a ukulele, and my rather hesitant voice. I had tried improvising on keyboard, and rhythm guitar, but eventually, I left that to my more talented, and well-trained, friends. 

I play a little bit of guitar and a bit more of piano, but improvisation is not my forte. So I finally ended up improvising vocally. And I discovered something.

It’s scary.

Singing around people doesn’t bother me. It really doesn’t. But I’m so used to relying on someone else’s music, in some form or another. I don’t write music. I can write lyrics, but I’m no composer. So musical improvisation is a bit frightening for me.

I was quiet and not exactly booming into the mike. I played around with some sounds, and after a while, I put aside my intimidation at the group of incredibly talented musicians that I was with (a little), I stopped worrying about what I sounded like (sort of), and I just pretty much sang nonsense syllables to whatever tune happened to pop into my head.

And it was a lot of fun. Everyone was improvising, after all, and some really interesting sounds ended up poking their heads out. And then we laughed a little bit, talked a little bit, and packed up.

So no huge breakthrough, no life-changing event, but a good experience, and one that I thoroughly enjoyed. And one that reminded me, I think, to take myself a little less seriously.

Now I really should go to bed. Just as soon as I figure out why Tumblr won’t let me let people comment…